now, does rock anthem imply that it must be of the rock genre? Or is this the song I just rock the fuck out to on the daily?
The song that I connect to my transition is “Whatya Want From Me?” by Adam Lambert. Because when I started coming out, I thought I was prepared for the changes that would occur. I didn’t think I’d lose my girlfriend of a 4 year tussle of back and forth bullshit for good, though I knew her ass needed to go. And I literally told my mom; “yeah, I’m a freak, but thanks for lovin’ me, your doing it perfectly…” when I last seen her in Pittsburgh.
Next, “Champagne Life” by Ne-Yo. I am THE NE-YO FREAK. My friends think I will go gay for him, no. I’m not really attracted to his face and baldness, lol. But I really admire his songwriting skills, because I wish I could write like him, and I admire his style, so I try and channel him alot in my gear. I can’t lie, I want my own “Champagne Life” lifestyle, not necessarily fast car nights and big boat days, but I want to be well off… no stress about anything because I can control it. Plus, I want to be a dapper dressed superhero.
Next, “I’m Flexin’” by T.I. and another dude I don’t remember his name. I’ve been hearing this lately when I do my workouts on Pandora. Whenever this song comes on, I just go ham in my work, it makes my workouts feel good.
Finally, Silence. I rock out to silence, that’s when I use my own words, if it be in a song, or spoken word/slam kind of work, I rock out to silence. I spit off the top of my head what the heart is feeling in that particular state where all I hear is my heartbeat in my ears as my unrhythmic metronome, but I notice the pulse goes away when I’m complete. I believe in the “if you don’t have anything nice to say then don’t say it at all.” because I tend to tear at people with my meanness if provoked… if provoked. But when needed I just release the slasher details of my state of mind and bring tides down to the almost tranquil ocean, almost…
because if my ocean was completely tranquil, I’d be dead.
Peace&Love
